(The Blog Formerly Known as "Countdown to 30" and "30 is the New Twenty")

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Oprah Says Jump Off a Cliff

It really amazes me how women are so brainwashed by Oprah. Seriously. Oprah could tell women to rub dog poop on their faces to look younger and everyone would. There's something about Oprah that makes her the expert on everything. If Oprah has UGGS and a Juicy tracksuit, then I should too! Oprah loves Beloved. It's my favorite book, too! Oprah endorses Obama, I like him too! I just don't get it. I used to think it was just stupid women who live in the backhills of Arkansas, but smart women buy into Oprah, too. Maybe because I like to think for myself or I see through Oprah's act, but this doesn't work on me. I am also highly cynical and can see through her marketing ploys.

The other day, while checking out the sales section in the shoe department at Kohl's, I saw Oprah's power in action. I I overheard a middle-aged women say, " I really should get these leopard print flats. Oprah says that every woman needs a pair of leopard print flats." I was so shocked, that I had to look around the aisle to see if this was true. It was real. Her friend agreed and she bought the shoes. Wow. That's brainwashing. I knew Oprah was powerful, but to see it in action in suburban Minnesota solidified the power of Oprah on women. To clarify, there's a big difference between seeing something on television and wanting it because you like it than buying something because Oprah said you need them. I'd much rather hear someone say, "oh, I should get these leopard print shoes; they're really fun" than "Oprah told me to buy these."

The influence of celebrity scares me. Women should be thinking for themselves, not doing things because they come with Oprah's seal of approval. What will women do because Oprah does it? How far will they go? Will they go get a trainer, a cook, and a huge condo because Oprah has these things? Will people buy 10 Juicy track suits because Oprah has them? Would you jump off a cliff because Oprah says it's OK? Not me. I'm thinking for myself.

I Love This Ad!

IBM has the greatest series of ads, "Stop Talking, Start Doing." This one, "Ideating" is my favorite. There's a series of about four or five ads that are constantly played on the NCAA tournament. I think everyone has worked with someone who is all about the buzz words. They're the person that is all talk and no action. It always amazes me how people don't see through the bs. Buzz words don't solve problems. It's like the buzz words brainwash them. The series of ads are just genius. Very well done and so very funny.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Dress Hunt '08

I've got two weddings to attend this summer. That means I need to find dresses to wear to them. I do have some cute sun dresses that I could wear, but I am just tired of them. Dresses are such a pain to shop for. I admit, I am a bit particular. I want something unique and something I might actually wear again. It just seems like all the dresses out there fit into two categories: super skanky teeny bopper or old lady. Since I fit into neither category, it makes it more challenging. Over the weekend, I thought I had found the perfect dress. I was shopping with the relatives at Kohl's when I stumbled upon the cutest Simply Vera dress. I loved the slightly retro style and the color combo is perfect for my hair and complexion. I could actually see myself wearing this again. Plus, if the weather was unpredictable, I could throw a blazer or sweater over it. The best part was the dress was on sale and I had a 15% off coupon. I tried the dress on and it fit me like a mumu. I had plenty of room for a mom pouch. Perfect for playing crabby old lady. All I needed was a pair of terry cloth slippers. I was so mad. The kicker: I tried on the XS. I am small, but I am not Olsen twin small. I just assumed that the dress would be cut on the small side, since it was Vera Wang. I forgot I was at Kohl's. It's just so strange. I can usually fit into misses sized clothes. Sigh. It looks like dress hunt '08 continues.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Happy Easter from Scary Cat

Nothing says Easter like a little kitten with a disturbing look on her face. It makes me chuckle. If I was a little kid, this image would terrify me. It is better suited for Halloween than Easter. What was the marketing gurus at Starbursts thinking? Hmmm.... cute little ducks and bunnies are too much of an Easter cliche! We want a kitten with a psycho look on her face. What's wrong with fluffy? Did she eat too much tuna or did her owners abandon her? My guess is she has an angry look on her face because someone didn't finish their jellybeans. This Easter make sure scary cat doesn't get you; eat all your jellybeans. Happy Easter!

Go Away Winter!

I thought I was done dressing like Marge Gunderson a la "Fargo" apparently it's not quite time to put away my parka and my winter boots. Seriously, I am done with winter! No more. I guess it's not really that bad because the snow won't stick around. Today was the last straw having to shovel snow. It's just a pain to keep switching from winter coat to spring coat to parka in the course of a week. I do realize that it is Minnesota and it can pretty much snow until Memorial Day; I'd just like to enjoy spring for a change.

While I was outside shoveling the sidewalk, a man was attempting to plow the streets/ sidewalk, but was having a horrible time maneuvering the truck (he kept having to backing up, inching forward, repeat several times move). I sort of felt bad for him, until I got a little closer. He was having a conversation on his cell phone. Seriously. If you're going to be plowing anything, perhaps it would be easier to not talk on your phone. Duh. It did make me chuckle.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Puffcorn: The Lazyman's Popcorn

I am hopelessly addicted to Old Dutch's Puffcorn. It is the best stuff ever! I swear it has to be laced with crack because it is so addicting. Puffcorn combines the salty, buttery taste of popcorn with the air-puffed goodness of a cheesy poof. It's super cheap,too. Target sells a big ass bag for $2.30. The other night I ate half a bag while watching television. The only problem with Puffcorn is I can't stop eating it.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008


Daylight Saving Time is still kicking my ass. Last night I couldn't fall asleep at all! Once I did fall asleep, I kept waking up every couple of hours like a senior citizen. Ugh. It was awful. This morning I had the hardest time getting out of bed and felt like I had been up for three days. So tired of this! I just want to feel normal. Hopefully, this ends soon.

I worked on my screenplay yesterday. I wrote four pages and I planned out the plot. I haven't written any new scenes since December. It feels good. I think I was motivated by "Juno." I am hoping I can keep this up.

Monday, March 10, 2008


I finally got around to seeing "Juno" today. Wow. It was fabulous. I was so amazed. It literally brought me to tears because it was such a well-done movie. When it was over, I was a bit sad. I seriously could've watched it again. It's well-written and well-acted. It is the best teen-pregnancy movie I've ever seen. It has such a fresh, new take on teenage pregnancy. And it wasn't just another teenage comedy, either. Good realistic teenage characters. It had such heart and really explained teenage life in suburbia. I was so impressed. Allison Janney had the perfect "mom" outfits; they really reminded me of my own Mom's wardrobe of comfy clothing. The casting was perfect. I loved Jason Bateman and Jennifer Garner as the yuppie couple. Ellen Page is simply amazing.

I really liked the Midwestern suburbia touches of the movie. It is so dead-on. Juno's house has the homey cluttered quality. Her step-mom clearly shops at JCP and Sears. The family has a mini-van. Juno and her friends play pranks on each other. They drink slushies. Yeah, people probably do these things on the east coast, but there's this indescribable Midwestern quality about the movie that made me nostalgic for my own childhood in Midwestern suburbia.

It was nice to finally see the movie and be able to form my own opinions about the movie. I don't understand why people don't think the dialogue wasn't realistic for teens. Juno is a smart. sassy teenager, of course she's going to talk different than an average kid. People also took issue with the catch phrases. That's another part of teenage vernacular. And Diablo really deserved the Oscar. It is so well-written.

I left the theater so inspired to work on my own writing.

Daylight Savings Time= Ugh

I am not a big fan of Daylight Savings Time. I know, I know, we're doing it for those poor kids in Indiana who had to wait for the school bus in the dark. The horror. I do enjoy having it be lighter longer, but it is really hard for my body to get used to it. This phenomenon started a couple of years ago. It must be a side effect of getting old. It seriously takes me a week to get used to DLST. This morning I woke up and felt like crap. I felt like I'd been up late drinking and was horribly hungover. Except, I went to bed early and haven't had any alcohol in days. After a cup of coffee, the pseudo-hangover effect went away, but I still feel like I'm running in my own time zone.

The weird thing is I don't really get jet-lagged when I fly. Granted, I've never left the US, but whenever I end up in the Eastern time zone, I never have a problem adjusting. I have a feeling that my DLST adjustment is psychological. There I said it. This year, I am doing my best to trick myself into not thinking about DLST. It worked yesterday when I had to work at 8 am, after working until 12 am, the night before. Yesterday, I didn't even think about the fact that I was getting up at 5 am instead of 6 am. That actually helped. I was a bit tired and crabby at work, but it really helped in my survival.

At least spring seems to be lurking right around the corner. It's supposed to be in the 40's tomorrow. Woo-hoo! For us Minnesotans, that means a heat wave! Break out the shorts. I am really looking forward to wearing spring jackets. I am tired of my winter coats.

Thursday, March 6, 2008


Yesterday I was shocked and saddened to find out that the Oak Street Cinema is more than likely closing its doors in May. I love that theater. I used to go there quite a bit in college. When I lived in T-Hall, it was practically in my backyard. They hosted the Minneapolis- Saint Paul International Film Fest and other cool events. I love old theaters with character. It makes watching movies a much better experience than at the 24 screen multi-plex.

I just hate it when old buildings like that get closed and torn down in order to build more housing. I wish that someone could save it and if they don't show movies there, they could turn it into a restaurant or a club (sorta of a la the Varsity Theater). I'll have to make sure that I make it there one last time before it closes.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Road Rage Minnesota Style

This morning my psychic abilities kicked in and told me to leave for work extra early. Good thing I did, because it took me about 35 minutes to go 2 miles. Normally, I could get myself to work in that amount of time. Yikes. I just don't understand you, silly Minnesotans: why does a dusting of snow cause people to forget how to drive and just drive stupid? One would think that we would be old pros. Seriouly. It's the one thing that miffs me. And makes me crabby. Grrr.... At least I managed to arrive at work on time and in one piece.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Yet Another Reason Why Tina Fey Rocks

I know I'm a little late with posting about this, but Tina Fey made her return to SNL last Saturday. If you haven't watched her "Weekend Update" segment, you need to watch it here. Seriously. The Hillary part was the best--and so true. Especially the part about women doing what "Oprah" tells them to do (don't even get me started on her). What I love the most about Tina Fey is she's not afraid to speak her mind and tell it like it is. Everything she said is so true. Women don't like other women that are in a position of power or who are outspoken or who get things done. I don't get that. Women should be working together not against each other . I completely agree that "bitch is the new black."